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09-10-2009, 01:33 PM
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Sammy's Loveable keeper
 
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: SomePlace in the NW
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My Duck is Dead
My Duck is Dead
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," replied the vet.
"How can you be so sure?" she protested... "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room.
He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room.
A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"
The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the CAT scan, it's now $150."
__________________
If all else fails, read the directions.
0.1.0 BCI Sammy, 1.1.0 Royal Python Bonnie & Clyde, 0.0.1 Corn Snake Anakin, 0.1.0 JCP Leia
Fallen Pets
leo's(RIP Scooter, Skipper RIP),Rat (RIP Lucy RIP), Boa (RIP Phoenix)
America does not go abroad in search of monsters to destroy. She is the well-wisher to the freedom and independence of all. She well knows that by enlisting under other banners than her own, were they even the banners of foreign independence, she would involve herself beyond the power of extrication in all the wars of interest and intrigue, of individual avarice, envy and ambition, which assume the colors and usurp the standards of freedom. – John Quincy Adams (1821)
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09-10-2009, 01:44 PM
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Dorkus majorkus.

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Join Date: May 2009
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Re: My Duck is Dead
__________________
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09-10-2009, 02:05 PM
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ms. anthropomorphist
  
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Join Date: Oct 2003
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Re: My Duck is Dead
__________________
"Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened"-Anatole France
IF YOU DON'T STAND BEHIND OUR TROOPS, PLEASE, FEEL FREE TO STAND IN FRONT OF THEM.
RIP Max, i love you
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09-10-2009, 02:22 PM
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wants a bigger snake!
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Join Date: Nov 2008
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Re: My Duck is Dead
Haha, that's funny right there!
__________________

1.0 BCI - Pablo aka Hisser
0.1 BCI - Goldi
0.2 Carpet Pythons, Sydney & Hades
2 dogs, 1 devil cat,
1 FIsh Aquarium
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09-10-2009, 03:15 PM
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RTB Aficionado
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Re: My Duck is Dead
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