Be careful what you wish for

[Stargazer]

I actually have a joke that is clean and forum-appropriate, so I thought I'd better share it:
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Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it!

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The
waitress asks them for their orders.

The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich,
'What's yours?' 'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be $9.40
please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A
hamburger, fries and a coke.' The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same.'
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the
waitress. 'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a
salad,' says the man. 'Same,' says the ostrich.

Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be $32.62.' Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places
it on the table.

The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in
your pocket every time?'

'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found
an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me
two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I
would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount
of money would always be there.'

'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. 'Most people would ask for a million
dollars or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want
for as long as you live!'

'That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact
money is always there,' says the man.

The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?'

The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt and long legs who agrees with everything I say.'

[luker3232]

lol I havent heard this one in a very long time! lol thanks!

[spix14]

Lol!

[Brandon28]

That same lamp is the reason that I now have a 12-inch piano player.

[louise]

lol. i would pick an ostrich before i would some guys i have dated!

[BlackLava]

hahaha, thanks for the laugh!!

[Lucille]

Originally Posted by louise

lol. i would pick an ostrich before i would some guys i have dated!

Many thoughts came to mind upon reading that. Not all of them suitable for publication.

Not to hijack the thread, but I thought of several advantages of guys over ostriches:

Guys can pay the dinner tab
If you are married to a guy, you can sometimes get more favorable treatment on your income tax return. (However, I guess if you are married to an ostrich, you won't have to pay taxes at all because one doesn't receive income on the funny farm.)
You can tell whatever guy is in your house to take out the trash. Ostriches not having hands can't do that.

I do not personally know any ostriches so I can't make a comparison, but I tend to agree with Louise, some ostriches just have to be better than some of the guys I have dated.