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12-08-2002, 09:05 PM
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I am an RTB Addict !
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Location: Morristown, AZ
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86511
When I was a young turkey, new to the coop,
My big brother Mike took me out to the stoop,
Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow,
And he told me there was something that I had to know;
His look and his tone I will always remember,
When he told me of the horrors of...Black November.
"Come about August, now listen to me,
Each day you'll get six meals instead of just three,
"And soon you'll be thick, where once you were thin,
And you'll grow a big rubbery thing under your chin;
"And then one morning, when you're warm in your bed,
In'll burst the farmer"s wife, and hack off your head;
"Then she'll pluck out all your feathers so your bald n' pink,
And scoop out all your insides and leave ya lyin' in the sink;
"And then comes the worst part" he said not bluffing,
"She'll spread your cheeks and pack your rear with stuffing".
Well, the rest of his words were too grim to repeat,
I sat on the sroop like a winged piece of meat,
And decided on the spot that to avoid being cooked,
I'd have to lay low and remain overlooked;
I began a new diet of nuts and granola,
High-roughage salads, juice and diet cola;
And as they ate pastries, chocolates and crepes,
I stayed in my room doing Jane Fonda tapes;
I maintained my weight of two pounds and a half,
And tried not to notice when the bigger birds laughed;
But 'twas I who was laughing, under my breath,
As they chomped and they chewed, ever closer to death.
And sure enough when Black November rolled around,
I was the last turkey left in the entire compound;
So now I'm a pet in the farmer's wife's lap;
I haven't a worry, so I eat and I nap;
She held me today, while sewing and humming,
And smiled at me and said "Christmas is coming..."
[img]modules/Forum/images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]modules/Forum/images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]modules/Forum/images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
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12-08-2002, 10:30 PM
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Regular RTB User
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Location: Austin
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86515
BAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! [img]modules/Forum/images/smiles/icon_lol.gif[/img] Very good little story there Steve, Thanks for sharing!
ps. Hows the hog doing?
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12-09-2002, 02:17 AM
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I am an RTB Addict !
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Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Morristown, AZ
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86532
Thanks Rob! The "little" hog is getting bigger and is doing great! He just shed the other day and the has just the slightest scar yet on his snout. Next spring/summer I'd like to find a future mate for Cycas.
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12-09-2002, 03:00 AM
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I am an RTB Addict !
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86535
How's this for a Thanksgiving poem?
Turkeys hate the chopping block,
The awful, awful chopping block.
Every year on this day,
Turkey heads are chopped away.
Bry
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12-09-2002, 03:37 AM
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I am an RTB Addict !
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Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Morristown, AZ
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Total Points: 2,418.31
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86541
I like it...short and to the point!!! [img]modules/Forum/images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]modules/Forum/images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img] [img]modules/Forum/images/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
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12-09-2002, 10:14 AM
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86592
Steve.. CUTE
BRY.. Don't quit the day job to become a poet at all anywhere in the near future [img]modules/Forum/images/smiles/icon_wink.gif[/img]
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