Sickly Siamese - Page 6

snakehooked · #**101** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 03:52 AM

I'm so sorry, I hope at the very least he goes happily and peacefully.

Stargazer · #**102** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 03:54 AM

If he makes it through the night, I will have the tough decision again tomorrow of whether to euthanize. He is lying in my bed with his head and back resting against both my pillows. Even in his death, he is spoiled rotten. I would have never even needed such a nice bed. I bought it for him 8 years ago and he lets me share it.

Stargazer · #**103** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 03:55 AM

I still don't know why he went down so quickly. He seemed to be doing so well.

Even though he can barely move, I got up to go into the kitchen for 5 minutes. When I came back, he was trying to crawl off the bed in the direction where I'd gone.

I'm afraid he won't be able to let go because he loves me so much. And it's hard for me to tell him it's okay to die. I feel so selfish. I've been bawling my eyes out all day. I sometimes wonder if there is a such thing as completely selfless human love. If there is, I know I'm not a good example of it.

Stargazer · #**104** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 04:00 AM

This cat has been with me for nearly 10 years now. He has slept either under the covers right beside me, on top of me, or right by my head on the pillow for all those years. He likes to snuggle his head under my chin. In his younger days, he liked to climb into my shirt to get a "kneading". He has been my constant companion. I don't know how to let him go. I just wasn't expecting this so soon.

Sakara · #**105** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 04:02 AM

poor baby...

lay him on his back and rub his belly gently, then rub his little paws and his little ears and tell him you love him

Stargazer · #**106** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 04:06 AM

I've been doing it all day. But I will do it again. I'm having a really hard time letting go of him. He is so special to me. He is like a little angel. I've had several guys give me ultimatums over him. You can see who won.

Stargazer · #**107** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 04:07 AM

The only way I can console myself is to tell myself that I will be with him again some day. I really hope that is true, cause I know I won't be able to cope very well with losing him.

Sakara · #**108** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 04:12 AM

oh you will see him again... The only difference is that next time he will be with you for eternity and follow you around in Heaven always

And it sucks to let any pet go, I know that, but just remember that he will never be in pain again and he loves his mommy.

Stargazer · #**109** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 04:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sakara

oh you will see him again... The only difference is that next time he will be with you for eternity and follow you around in Heaven always

I hope you're right. I feel like I need to distract myself so I don't have to deal with it. At times like this, I really wish I had a husband so I don't have to go through this alone.

Sakara · #**110** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 04:31 AM

I sorry

-KB- · #**111** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 04:34 AM

I'm so sorry to hear about this, I'm keeping you both in my thoughts and prayers.

Hartsock · #**112** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 05:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stargazer

I still don't know why he went down so quickly. He seemed to be doing so well.
Even though he can barely move, I got up to go into the kitchen for 5 minutes. When I came back, he was trying to crawl off the bed in the direction where I'd gone.

I'm afraid he won't be able to let go because he loves me so much. And it's hard for me to tell him it's okay to die. I feel so selfish. I've been bawling my eyes out all day. I sometimes wonder if there is a such thing as completely selfless human love. If there is, I know I'm not a good example of it.

Sherri, it's okay to be selfish. It's okay not to want to let him go. It's all okay for you to feel the way you do. In the end, you'll do what is right for him, whether it is to have him stay with you till the end or to have him ethuanized. You'll make that choice out of your love for him. None of us can say which is the right thing for you to do, you'll just know. Only thing I will say is that you are not allowed to second guess yourself. You love him and that will guide what you do; can't look back on that and do "what if"s like you said about your other cat. That decision was the right one as well since it was done with the best interests in your beloved pet. It sucks to be in the position you are in; but look at that cat and how he is still trying to be with you. He loves you so much and he does because he know he is loved by you. He trusts you enough to take care of him and knows that you will do what is best for him no matter what.

One thing I have learned about you on here is that you have a passion to do what you feel is the right thing to do. None of us can tell you what that is, but I for one can take a stand saying I believe in you and you'll know that by observing him and following your heart in the direction it takes you.

Katie M · #**113** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 05:36 AM

I am so sorry Sherri... If I was there, I would hold your hand through all of this. Even when it's the right decision, it's normal to feel some trepidation about it. If you didn't have any concerns or regard for that, you wouldn't be you. I am crying so hard over here. I miss my Hermie, but Herman will be there to welcome Willowee when it's time. He's a great boy, and will keep your boy company till we get to meet them again

Sakara · #**114** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 05:38 AM

my Precious will be waiting to play with Willowee as well... Just remember that they are no longer in pain and they will be waiting for us on the other side

Sinthia · #**115** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 06:05 AM

This is breaking my heart, I am so very sorry that you have to go through this. Just remember you are not alone..from reading this, there are many of us here to support you and help you through this. I truly wish you the best, and am here if you ever need someone to talk to. Goodluck to both of you, you are a great mommy!

John · #**116** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 06:08 AM

Sherri, I'm so sorry to hear about your cat. It's amazing how special pets can be. It's wonderful that you have had a pet you could love so much.

Icicle · #**117** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 06:37 AM

I'm also sorry to hear about this Sherri.

I will keep you both in my thoughts.

M2788 · #**118** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 11:36 AM

Oh Sherri, I am so, so sorry about Willowee; I am quite literally tearing up as I write this.

I know how much you love him, and how much he clearly loves you. I can sympathize with what you are going through; the youngest of the ferrets I had, Merlin, died of kidney failure due to a genetic disorder that he was born with several years ago and I still remember it like it just happened. I loved that ferret more than I could ever say, and it just about broke me to lose him. I agree with the others that you will know when it his time, and that you will know when the time comes whether it would be best to have him put down or to keep him at home as he passes. Either way I have faith that you will make the right decision for him, whichever it may be. Merlin, my ferret was in a confused state of misery in his last hours, not wanting to move from my lap and clearly suffering, and after consulting my vet; I chose to have him humanely euthanized in my arms. It was the kindest option, and despite how much it hurt me, I don’t regret having made that choice.

I will be praying for both you and Willowee, and if you ever need to talk, no matter what time it is, please feel free to call.

Again, I am so sorry about Willowee. Please give him a hug for me.

BorderKelpie · #**119** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 12:58 PM

I just wanted to express my sympathy to you as well. I, too have siamese cats, they are awesome little guys. Willowee knows you love him and will accept whatever you do for him. Follow your heart, it knows what's right, that's how you found him in the first place, isn't it?
Hang in there. I am sorry you two are having to go throgh this.

Stargazer · #**120** (**permalink**) 01-28-2010, 06:31 PM

Your words mean a lot to me, everyone. I cannot stop crying. I called the at-home euthanasia lady and left her a message. But I don't know if I can go through with it. Willowee scooted around all night trying to get closer to me. He smells so bad, I kept moving over, and he chased me to the end of the bed! He peed on the bed and on me in the middle of the night. I just held him and went back to sleep, but today I'm cleaning up the mess. He still managed a weak purr when I was cuddling him. I really thought that cats go off to be alone when they die. It would make it so much easier.

This morning I got a large box and made him a little bed in the corner of my bedroom. He was trying to stand up and drink water, but still not eating. I washed his little butt, and he was trying to lick it. His head kept falling and resting like that. I don't think that is a dignified way to die. I know euthanasia is the kindest thing to do at this point. But I'm just having a hard time with it. I don't know if I can do it. If I don't make the decision today to have him put down today or tomorrow, I'm afraid we'll have to go through the weekend like this. Even though he is suffering, I also have to live with the memory of how he died. I will be suffering for a long time, it seems, no matter what.

I think I will go to a pet loss support group tonight if I can.

I cannot believe how much I love this cat. I honestly don't know what I will do without him. I still have my other cat, and we are very close too, but he is just so special. I'd almost rather my right arm be ripped off than to lose him.

It was a very poor flaw in the design of living things that we have to outlive our pets. There is already so much suffering in life. Why can't we just take our pets with us when we go?

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