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[Bluzmn59]

And now, leave the lawyer jokes to a lawyer..............

1) Why does the American Bar Association ban sex between lawyers and their clients? To prevent the clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.

2) What is the difference between a lawyer and a tick? A tick will drop off of you once you're dead. (there is an R-rated version involving a hooker)

3) What is the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a scum-sucking scavenger and the other is just a fish.

And my all-time favorite?

A lawyer, a doctor and an engineer were arguing about who had the oldest profession:

The doctor says, "if you look in the Book of Genesis, God removed a rib from a man and created a woman. That is obviously surgery and, therefore, my profession is obviously the oldest."

"Not so fast," says the engineer. "If you read earlier in the Book of Genesis, out of chaos God created the earth in just six days. That is one heck of an engineering feat, and my profession is obviously the oldest."

The lawyer just shook his head and chuckled. "How do you think it got be chaos in the first place?"