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This is much of the reason I haven't been around much, as this has been extremely hard for me, even more so because we have a 5 year old son who still doesn't really know what's going on.
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Its always hard on the kids. I grew up most of my life without my father and my mom did a very good job raising me being independent as she is. I am sure you will pull threw and those sunnydays will come again. The only thing your son needs is a loving mother who can give him the attention of both parents, which I am sure you are capable of doing

Goodluck.